" Tired of It All":A Reflective Classroom Teacher 25

There will be days of frustration. At times you will feel you do not have the strength or the will to continue in the classroom. We have all had these feelings from time to time. That is the reality of any profession, not just teaching. If however, this feeling of despair and of being overwhelmed continues over an extended period of time, it is time for honest reflection.
Our suggestion is that you try and pinpoint what it is that is causing the depression. There is a good possibility that the feelings you are experiencing have multiply causation's.
What exactly are you feeling? In discussing this issue with our peers they have offered the following possibilities to consider. Some indicated that they always had a feeling of not being able to do enough. They always felt that time management was a weakness and they would never overcome the feeling of not teaching to fruition.
Many referred to a feeling of physical and mental exhaustion. There was never enough time in the day to refresh the body or the mind. They indicated that there was always a feeling of depression or futility and emptiness. They felt they were on their own and administrators were not concerned with their personal issues. The first and last priority of administrators was always the children, never the teachers.
In most cases, these potential burnouts indicated that they started to withdraw socially and utilize the time for their own needs. They became islands unto themselves fearing that no one was interested in their feelings. They felt guilt for having spent so much time, money and energy of becoming a teacher just to realize after a few years, that it was possibly not for them.
They had a feeling of failure. They had failed their peers, their students, their families and most important, a feeling of self-failure. These teachers were of the opinion that all they were and all they could ever be, was a teacher. They have become obsessive about teaching and their abilities and they could no longer make a separation between occupation and self.
My friends spoke of an anger they had. This anger would shift from person to person, depending on whom they perceived as the cause of their unhappiness, on that day.
Each had a desire to escape, to run away from their fears. They sought the safety being responsible for only one. They perceived their burden as being not only unique; but terminal as well. They were in the depths of depression and there was no escape possible if they remained in the classroom.
From a personal viewpoint, what they told us was true. We have experienced that state of mind on more than one occasion. Let us all practice a little honest reflection on the subject of burnout.
A. Burnout is a relative concept. Others in our profession experience the same things we do and reach a more positive conclusion about their jobs and themselves. Why are we so different? We need to consider three factors. First, is our tolerance level unrealistic and does it lean towards perfectionism? Second, how much do I as an individual need to be in control? Third, how much control does one really have in life?
We must recognize events or circumstances that cause us burn-out an address those issues which we can control. The most common causes of burn-out among teachers include the following:
1. The feeling that we do not make a difference.
2. That we have lost control.
3. That we are alone.
It would be so easy at this point to say, stop feeling sorry for yourself and get on with life. That would not be honest reflection. That would be a simplistic solution to a very complex set of circumstances.
People do burnout and no amount of repair is going to keep them in the classroom. At times, it is proper to abandon one's chosen profession and move on to new endeavors. However, it is prudent that we take our time, examine our options and seek advise before we walk away from something, that at one time, gave us a great deal of pleasure and satisfaction. There are steps to be taken in this process of self-assessment.
a. Confide in your peers. Perhaps you are too close to the situation to be objective about your situation. You will notice that I did not suggest family members as advisors. Their lack of objectivity is a given in this case.
b. Discuss your concerns with your administrators. There is a good possibility that many of your concerns can be addressed at this level.
c. Seek the help of a professional. Psychologist deal with such matters on a daily bases.
f. Realize that you are not unique in your feelings. Perhaps, for you, the solution is to change occupations.
g. What changes can be made? Before any decision is made ask yourself; what can be done, by you, to make the situation better? What changes can you make in your own life? What can you control and what can't you control?
h. Make two lists concerning your teaching. On one side of the paper, list the positives and on the other side the negatives. Circle the negatives you can control. The ones you perceive as having no control over should be the focus of your concern. Don't become overwhelmed by your perception that everything has gone south. It has not. That is just your perception at a given time in your life.
i. Life changes. Life changes because of time, place, circumstances and efforts by others or ourselves. If we want some control over the direction of our lives are going. It is best done by our own efforts after considerable thought. We are dynamic beings subject to change. We do not have to maintain the status quo, especially if it is making our life unbearable. We have a birthright that suggests that we seek happiness in our lives.

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